Barclay’s new boss and customer feelings PR blather – your service really is piss poor

I have banked with Barclays all my life as has my dad and as did his dad. I worked there for a while. And so it is pretty hard for me to contemplate moving – I am not a hard customer to retain, there is a lot of inertia. So when the new CEO of Barclays, Alan Jenkins, writes to his staff saying that they should think about their customer’s feelings, I dismiss it as PR blather. Of course it is nothing more than that from the man who replaces bankster Bob Diamond. Barclays treats its customers like shit, just like all the other banks – as I am finding to my cost right now. I am thinking I may move not because the staff do not think about my feelings but because they are useless.

It is not as if I or Real Man Pizza Company wish to borrow money. I know that Barclays like all the banks does not plan to lend to small businesses it will just put out press releases saying that it knows how small businesses feel. Let down, would be the words I would use. All I want is to open an account for RMPC in the UK. Should not be hard should it? RMPC has cash in the bank and does a decent amount of transactional business and does not want or need to borrow a cent. Easy.

Why open a UK account? Because Barclays IOM is insisting we close the Isle of Man Account since once every five months we deposit cash in a UK branch. A grown up bank would simply move the account to a UK branch and treat its customers as if it gave a shit. But Barclays insets we open a new account. And fast. So I troop along to Hatton Garden Barclays where I am kept waiting for 20 minutes until a business manager can spare 2 minutes.

The woman who eventually deigns to see me says that her diary is full for the next 2 weeks and that she will not even give me a form to fill in without an appointment. After a lengthy debate in which I explain that if I wait 2 weeks her company will close my account and so trash my business she agrees to hand over forms for me to fill in and gives me a number to call where she promises I can make an appointment with a “business manager” so that he can accept the forms and talk to me about what services Barclays offers. I cannot just send the forms in even though I explain I do not want of Barclays any bloody services just for it to earn lots of money from transactional income and from paying 0% interest as it sits on RMPC’s cash.

The firms are filled in quickly and I call the number. After explaining my position to another very stupid woman it is clear that this is not the business manager line at all and eventually I manage to persuade her to put me through to the business management team. I explain again. I say I have the forms and will travel anywhere in the UK to see a business manager who is free before October and the woman promises she will call back to get an appointment sharpish. That was yesterday. I await the call.

So Alan, want to know how I feel? Do you really care? I feel let down, I feel exasperated that my time is being wasted again and again. I feel angry that you employ such stupid people to whom I have to explain a situation (caused by the failure of your team simply to transfer an account – which I know they could since I did just that personally two years ago) numerous times and still do not get it. I am worried that the latest woman (Tracey) has not called back. I feel that your staff do not give a shit. I feel that the woman who claimed her diary was full for two weeks is a lazy cow. I feel that even if you read this you probably would not care either.

Unfair?