Oh dear, it seems that my article about how University lecturers were lazy, greedy and spent their time filling the heads of kids with left wing nonsense went down badly with the Mrs. That is, of course, because she is a lecturer, in sociology.
She thought about going on strike with her comrades in the Union. When lecturers go on strike it does not mean manning picket lines. Oh no, that would imply going to campus which is something many of them do rarely, and also actual physical effort. rather it means having the day off and doing no work at all.
But the Mrs reckons that she must show solidarity with her fellow exploited workers and so is indeed on strike. At this point I ponder the plight of the poor oppressed lecturers earning way above average earnings with 100% job security in good times and bad, with padded pension schemes paid for by the taxes, the sweat of those who work in less pleasant factories for far less money. I consider the long vacations when lecturers are free from teaching pesky students to toil away on research papers in the sweatshops of Tuscany and Provence. I consider while how most of us get up to ensure we are at our desks from 7 AM every day of the week, 48 weeks a year, but the poor lecturers miss out on this pleasant routine. How they must suffer as they enjoy a lie in?
Truly this is a heroic struggle and the Mrs should withdraw her threat of divorce on the grounds that I am an unreconstructed right winger.
For I am inspired to show solidarity with the oppressed lecturers as they struggle against an exploitative Government. As I think of the poor downtrodden university folk today my mind thinks of the Jarrow marchers, of the nobility of the General Strike of 1926 or of the way that wicked Maggie Thatcher sent the police to baton charge the heroic comrade miners at Orgreave. The lecturers are indeed following in that tradition.
I think of Billy Bragg..."Theirs is a land of hope and glory, mine is the green field and the factory floor.....I'll give my consent to any Government that does not deny a man a living wage...Bring out the banners from the days gone by"
Yeah Billy your words resonate on campuses across the land, you are no longer the Bard of Barking you are the Lyricist of Lecturers, the Poet of the Polys, Workers of the World Unite you have nothing to lose but your chains. Lets start a revolution.