354 days ago
I start with the annual horror that is doing a tax return for the Mrs. It was a pleasant shock. Then onto Left and Gamestop. Then I look at MyHealthChecked (MHC), Novacyt (NCYT), Jubilee Metals (JLP), another man with a posh wife who might struggle with her tax return, Mr David Beckham and E-Guild (GILD) and the real issue at [email protected] Capital (SYME)
1813 days ago
If you have to do a tax return today is the last day to submit if you want to avoid a £100 fine. Last year I goofed. This year the admirable Mrs Evil Knievil of the fine firm of Cawkwells has worked wonders and the form has just gone in. I owe HMRC £2 which I am delighted to say has already been paid by Mrs C so we are all square! The Mrs went one better.
2181 days ago
For once I am ahead of the game with my tax return. Thanks to the fine firm of Cawkwells - that is to say the long suffering Mrs Evil Knievil, my forms are agreed and being submitted today. But the deadline is looming...
2887 days ago
I pondered at the end of January the mystery of who had filled in my tax return? Who was my angel? At long last it emerges who was the angel. It was my father. But Dad was not quite as helpful as it might seem.
We were both registered at the same address. He is Thomas John and I am Thomas John Zacchaeus. And so helpfully used my unique tax number to fill in his return. Thanks to the generosity of the Universities final salary pension scheme and to a few other little income streams the old man actually owes HMRC a few bob – I know because he has sent me his return to prove it.
I am actually owed money and so was quite keen to fill in my return but the HMRC started by insisting that I had done so already. When they called my father to clarify the matter he refused to hand over my phone number and berated them for their incompetence. For once I actually feel sorry for the Tax Man as it was not his error.
Finally all is sorted and I have just got a letter saying that the person who was squatting on my unique tax number has been shuffled on and I can file away. If there is any justice the file for late filing will be allocated to the TJ Winnifrith who owes HMRC money rather than to his son, the victim of this whole episode with his tax refund delayed.
2911 days ago
Cripes I have been dreading this. Not because I owe money. I reckon I am actually owed a few quid. The Mrs reckons the same. So this morning we are both sitting at computers and off we go.
The Mrs asks how to spell my middle name? Z –A-C-C-H-A-E-U-S – easy? She thinks she can claim a married couples allowance but I point out that we got married in September and this refers to the year ended April 5. To think that her father is an accountant. As it happens Zacchaeus was himself a tax collector from Jerichi. It was also the name of the first of my ancestors to move over to Ireland in the 1600s.
Sadly I fare no better having lost my Unique Tax Reference number. So I call and after navigating a voice recognition system I get through to a lovely lady from the HMRC who says that someone has already submitted a paper return for me. Who? Who cares? I am off the hook. But she will send me a copy so I can check the sums and hopefully claim back a few quid.
What a result. A task dreaded is done thanks to my mystery guardian angel.