Newspeak

2214 days ago

No Hannah Winterbourne you have not always been a woman you used to have a penis

The Sun Newspaper stands accused of transphobia for running a story about a man who used to be a woman marrying a woman who used to be a man. Hannah Winterbourne, a soldier, who is the bride says the story is untrue because she has always been a woman and her husband always been a man. I guess this is a timely refresher on the Orwellian world of 1984. You see I use Oldspeak..

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4210 days ago

Graham the Train Manager – what is a train manager?

When did a linesman become an assistant referee? When did a salesman become a sales “consultant?” I do not know but consultant sounds sort of important. Salesman…oooh you mean a bloke who speaks estuary English and tries to flog you things you do not want? No that is a sales consultant. But he can’t be like that because he is not a salesman he is a sales consultant. And that brings me to Graham.

Stepping on the Great First Western train Graham, who says that he is the “train manager” informs us all that we must read the safety instructions (also in Braille) next to our seat. I have never read them and the bloke opposite confesses that he has not either. We both agree that we want to live life dangerously. Has anyone ever read them?

After a long explanation

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