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Dear Millennials you are useless lazy bastards so ( in a roundabout way) says the Tea House Theatre

Tom Winnifrith
Tuesday 18 July 2017

The Tea House Theatre in South London is looking for a young office worker (again). Its advert makes it clear that its experiences with the younger generation are not so good. So if you have your 2:2 in media studies from De Montfort University and fancy earning £20,000 in media rather than stacking shelves at Tesco here is the job advert. It's great stuff.

Dear Millennials,

As a professional company in the arts industry for the best part of twenty years, grafting, scraping, cap in hand to angels and funding bodies and occasionally getting lucky. Surviving on our box office, breaking even and revelling in the success that in the real world that is. It saddens me to be putting this advert up for the third time in as many months.

Are you just not taught anything about existing in the real world, where every penny counts. Did no one teach you that the end of your studies is the beginning of your education?

We are still here, after all these years. We run a venue in South Central London, we run as a receiving house, producing house. We have an outdoor events company putting on festivals on the Vauxhall Pleasure Gardens. We have been lucky enough to have been funded on several occasions in the last five years by Arts Council England for our outdoor projects, but the bulk of the funding for the art in and around our venue comes from the venue itself. We raise our own money by running a successful business alongside and intrinsically part of our art. We opened in a recession and are about to embark on a number of major projects.

One old lady used to run the whole of Mountview Academy with an IBM computer, it shouldn't be this hard.

We need a grafter, who can commit. The absolute dogs in office skills, the ability to run a paper filing system as well as a computerised one, the ability to complete and keep track of a huge to-do list, to make our office work, create and develop business management systems that help the business to grow, giving space for more creative work to go ahead. To see where we are headed and realise that it is in your own hands how far you are able to go with us as we grow.

We have not been impressed so far.

Yours sincerely

HG Iggulden & IF Rushton

Directors Tea House Theatre ltd

You can see the advert in full HERE

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About Tom Winnifrith
Tom Winnifrith is the editor of When he is not harvesting olives in Greece, he is (planning to) raise goats in Wales.
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