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Fancying lesbians, a problem shared with my late godfather Vicious

Tom Winnifrith
Tuesday 10 May 2016

If you are here as a result of a search on google you may well be disappointed by what follows although the matter at hand is fancying lesbians. But this is not about pornography you will be sad to discover. You see, the woman I fancied badly when at University has been in touch again.

Back in the day she was one of the most maddest lefties on this planet. Completely Upminster on every subject under the sun, that is to say way past Barking. But I still fancied her and a couple of years after we left, in a rather ham-fisted manner, tried it on. Very sweetly I was rejected without any disclosure of the fact that the woman was a lesbian. That may well have been obvious to the whole planet except me. call me naive.

Anyhow the woman, whose identity I shall protect, has now had a Damascene conversion and writes to tell me that she has joined the Scottish Libertarian party. I always feel a bit odd about the idea of being in a hierarchical organisation with folks who really want no organisations governing their lives but it this is truly a Damascene conversion and must be welcomed. I wonder after one of the most dramatic volte faces in history might she consider another? Probably not I suspect.

This woman is of course not the only great unrequited love of my life who turns out to be a lesbian. The woman who broke my heart back in 1985, Abbe, has spent most of her adult life with women although she assures me that she is really just a "common or garden bisexual." Whatever. To have lusted after one lesbian might seem understandable but (at least) two seems a bid above normal quotas.

My late godfather had a similar problem. He was a incredibly funny and good man who was named "vicious" by my mother because of his propensity to pick up women on buses. In his final years i asked him about this and he said it was wholly unfair. He rarely traveled on buses and he insisted that he just picked up women by bumping into them in the street. It was the 1960s after all. For him the sixties swung and carried on swinging into the 2000s.

Vicious married only once. His wife ended up as headmistress at my daughter's prep school by which time she had been out for many a year. I gather that she left vicious not because she wanted to start sleeping with other women but because he could not stop sleeping with other women. Vicious had a daughter later on with a woman who did leave him for a woman and he told me that there was a third serious relationship that ended in similar circumstances. It was, he concluded, that there was just a certain type of woman to whom he was most attracted.They may not have known that they were attracted to women when they met Vicious but his inner gaydar somehow detected it.

One of these days I will pen a serious essay on my godfathers and other women.

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About Tom Winnifrith
Tom Winnifrith is the editor of When he is not harvesting olives in Greece, he is (planning to) raise goats in Wales.
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