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Great lines for New Year's Eve with the mad lefty friends of the Mrs, Marine Le Pen could be a winner

Tom Winnifrith
Tuesday 27 December 2016

I have begged for a pass but it seems that I am committed to spend New Year's Eve with the deluded lefty friends of the Mrs, public sector workers the lot of them. The venue is, I think the house where the Mrs attended the 2015 General Election "victory party" which included that classic line "This can't be happening, I don't know anyone who votes Tory". I was almost sorry I missed that one.

But as we end 2016 and look forward to 2017 no doubt they will all be reflecting on Trump, Brexit, the Italian vote, Labour being a total joke, the War in Syria going the right way and all present, bar me, will be celebrating none of this.

My father advises me to stay sober and to bite my lip. My wife advises biting my lip knowing that I will be unable to endure this without an ouzo or four. But if provoked I have been contemplating a few winning lines. How about:

"Do you think it is wrong to fancy Marine Le Pen far more than Angela Merkel?"

"After Hillary, if Marine Le Pen loses how do you think we should tackle glass ceilings in 2017?"

"My wish for 2017? Clue - I'm wearing a Hillary for Prison-T-shirt, when do you expect her to get arrested?"

"Me too, yes I voted for Jezza - are you another Tory4Corbyn"
"You are in the Labour Party, - are you in the Jew hating part of it or are you outside the mainstream?"

"Yes, I was reading about that, the other day, in the Daily Mail"

"So looking forward, how will you be celebrating the triggering of article 50?"

"So you've married your (same sex) partner - another piece of social change only the Tories were enlightened enough to implement, its so good to have progressives in power don't you think?"

Feel free to make other suggestions in the comments box below. I don't think I can beat the Merkel/Le Pen line for when I encounter a particularly sour faced lefty, but perhaps you can do better?

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About Tom Winnifrith
Tom Winnifrith is the editor of When he is not harvesting olives in Greece, he is (planning to) raise goats in Wales.
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