Personal and undiluted views
All Stories

Friday Caption Contest – O Come All Ye Conservative Party Faithful Edition

Tom Winnifrith
Friday 7 December 2012

I was tempted to try to find a caption to reflect today’s news from David Cameron of his new flagship policy to reach out to address the key concerns of hard pressed middle England in these austere times. That is to say, allowing gay marriages in Church.

Having won such praise for our last caption contest featuring the Butcher of Londonderry I considered that in this season of goodwill we revisit Ulster which is still part of the United Kingdom but where, in an act of pure sectarian malice designed to provoke, the Union Flag will not now be flown over City hall in Belfast except on special occasions. If there is a problem what do you do? Send for an O’Clinton of course. The family that has brought peace, love and happiness to folks in Iraq, Syria, Egypt, Libya and the Lewinsky family, can do anything and so the vile Clinton woman met up with Martin McGuinness ( who must have been gutted that the EU rather than he won the Nobel Peace Prize) to sort it all out.

But I cannot think of anything funny to say about McGuinness any more. And so I fall back on the Doha Climate Change conference where Dave Cameron came up with another big vote winner: give two billion quid to African dictators to build wind farms to tackle global warming.

In light of this I ask you for your captions for this photo taken today. To win one of our “It’s Time to Leave” (the EU) T-shirts (which you can buy here.) please post your entries in the comments section below to this picture:

My entry is:

Sheep One: I really do think that £2 billion David Cameron has handed over to Africa will make a difference and won’t be stolen by corrupt leaders and officials
Sheep Two: But more importantly we might stop global warming before it is all too late.
Sheep Three: And Call Me Dave says that Dolly and I can get married in a church next year!
Sheep Four: So, it’s decided, no more dithering we are all voting Tory in 2015.

Last week I asked you for your captions to this picture:

All entries followed a similar Divine Line. And so the independent judge has awarded the prize to a Mr T Winnifrith (not my Dad before Christian Aid complains) for:

“Thank God for Leveson. Next time I get a hooker to give me a kerbside blow job it will ONLY appear on the internet.”

Good luck with your entries for this week’s contest, Post away.

If you enjoyed reading this article from Tom Winnifrith, why not help us cover our running costs with a donation?
About Tom Winnifrith
Bio
Tom Winnifrith is the editor of TomWinnifrith.com. When he is not harvesting olives in Greece, he is (planning to) raise goats in Wales.
Twitter
@TomWinnifrith
Email
[email protected]
Recently Featured on ShareProphets
Sign up for my weekly newsletter








Required Reading

Recent Comments


I also read