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A Modest Proposal for the Orwellian mask jihadists of Holt

Tom Winnifrith
Saturday 24 July 2021

Provoked by the sheer silliness of some of my neighbours back in the last village in Wales, I signalled my opposition to mask wearing on the village Facebook site last night. The response, as you’d imagine, has been Orwellian. And as such, I have a modest proposal for the face nappy jihadists…

My ire was prompted by a post expressing horror that customers at the local village store, a Nisa, were not wearing masks. Not only is this selfish as Covid cases are rising sharply in the Wrexham area but we were lectured that, in capitals, WE ARE IN WALES IT IS THE LAW!

The idea that one must have obeyed any law however bad or insane was big in 1930s Germany but not so popular in 1776 America. But I guess in this part of Wales, many folks feel it is better to be a Good German than a proud Yanky from Boston. More tea at the party Herr Hitler.

And so, to the horror of my wife, I posted that bad laws should not be obeyed and this was a bad law as there was no data to support its imposition. I cited the only large scale study, the one from Denmark which said that there was no statistical benefit from wearing a face nappy in terms of covid transmission.

In the village of Holt, all the vulnerable and nearly all the un-vulnerable have been vaccinated as we sheeple have been told that it will make us safe. But if that is the case, why do we have to still wear masks – which don’t work – as well? It is almost as if some folk like being bullied by Big Brother.

The response was that I was not a doctor and so not qualified to opine. Doctors in Wales have made their views clear we must wear masks. There you go. Just like the scientists who nearly all agreed in 1973 that we were heading for a new ice age, the experts who warned us that we were facing a mad cow disease Armageddon in the 1990s, who said that Thalidomide was safe, that the Y2k bug would wipe out humanity (and the list goes on), we must always bow to the experts whatever the data suggests.

This is something my late uncle Christopher Booker wrote about often and which we used to discuss in our long chats. “Experts” peer review each other to stifle dissent then say that non experts cannot have an opinion. That way, folks like Chris and me are not allowed to point out that data does not support their claims and their thesis. The “science” behind UK Covid response comes from Imperial college from the same team that predicted, a decade ago, many hundreds of thousands of deaths from both avian flu and swine fever. They were the “experts”. Guess what the actual data was?

I pointed out on the Holt Facebook page that analysing data and numbers IS my expertise but that does not matter. I am not trained as was Harold Shipman so my views don’t count.

I pointed out that the CDC reviewed all studies since 1947 on whether masks prevented flu transmission. The flu virus is not dissimilar in size and infection route to covid. The CDC conclusion was that masks did not work. So I have data and cite data but the Ministry of Truth has decreed that data is irrelevant, it is the views of the ministry and its experts which matter and dissent is not allowed.

That is how it works. And if you can’t see how Orwellian that is, you probably think that we have never been at war with Eastasia.

So I suggested a modest proposal for the mask jihadists of Holt who clearly have an overwhelming desire to signal their virtue in improving the public health of the village. Covid is the 26th most common cause of death in the UK today. Other diseases, notably heart disease and cancer, are killing many times as many folk and at a far younger age. In order to “protect the NHS”, early diagnosis of such ailments has been greatly reduced but, still, I have a modest proposal to turn the situation around.

I suggest that the jihadists gather in a socially distanced manner, masked up, allowing only those with a vaccine passport to participate, outside the village store. They should hold placards, naturally disinfected placards, calling out those buying fags, booze, chocolates, sugary foods, processed foods and fatty foods for risking their own lives and overburdening the NHS. To prevent the spread of the plague, with a 99.9% survival rate, they should not shout but should bring a ghetto blaster with screams of “you selfish bastard” for anyone seen buying an unhealthy item.

Only when the Nisa is selling unprocessed meat and fresh vegetables and nothing else at all can we solid and public-spirited citizens of Holt feel rest assured that we have truly protected the health of our community in tackling diseases which really are killing hundreds of folks a day. You may say that some folks cannot afford fresh vegetables and unprocessed meat. In that case, I refer you to the suggestion of the author of the original modest proposal.

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About Tom Winnifrith
Tom Winnifrith is the editor of When he is not harvesting olives in Greece, he is (planning to) raise goats in Wales.
[email protected]
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