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The Best of #socialistchatuplines – thanks twitter

Tom Winnifrith Sunday 30 June 2013

 

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Trending overnight among sad right wing folk on twitter ( i.e people like me) is #socialistchatuplines – since I am unable to sleep ( too much non Fair Trade coffee after a day of successful capitalism enjoyed with two employees on the minimum wage) I bring you the best of what has appeared to date with the undoubted winner right at the end. I write as someone who is dating a socialist but I did not use any of these lines...

Billy Bowden ‏@Ontablets 28m

#socialistchatuplines Did you hurt your head when you fell from heaven? Thats Thatchers fault!

Scott ‏@TheBenitezYears 33m

#socialistchatuplines I would love your number. But I don't have a phone as they are tools of the bourgeoisie, Capitalist pigs

Scott ‏@TheBenitezYears 59m

#socialistchatuplines Can you buy me a drink?

Jon Persson ‏@J__Persson 39m

Thatcher stole my milk when I was little. Buy me a drink? #socialistchatuplines

The devilish one ‏@Jigglypuff2344 1h

@Shugism #socialistchatuplines Roses are Pretty, Violets are Ok, but I can't buy you either, cos I'm on JSA.

Robyn ‏@robynalice12 18m

Honey, I would re-distribute myself all over you #socialistchatuplines

Scott ‏@TheBenitezYears 22m

#socialistchatuplines You can have the ownership of my Means of Production any day 

Robyn ‏@robynalice12 22m

It's you and me against the world baby, but let me just get them to pay for the drink first #socialistchatuplines

Jon Persson ‏@J__Persson 26m

Well, someone did a poor job regulating and redistributing your beauty. #socialistchatuplines

Jon Persson ‏@J__Persson 29m

Girl, I wouldn't mind taking *you* with me to the unemployment office. #socialistchatuplines

Billy Bowden ‏@Ontablets 30m

#socialistchatuplines Wanna see my WMD?

Jon Persson ‏@J__Persson 35m

Not to brag, but I've been on food stamps since before Obama took office. #socialistchatuplines

Sam Baxter ‏@SamJ_Bax 35m

Despite being a capitalist pigdog, I'm Stalin love with you #SocialistChatUpLines

Daniel Pryor ‏@DanielPryorr 38m

#socialistchatuplines Give me your money or I'll shoot you in the face...honey.

Damaine Gorman ‏@DamaineGorman 40m

#socialistchatuplines You're trash. These clubs are trash. Oh my, I'd rather edit Wikipedia than do this

Jack Holliss ‏@ToryHolliss 41m

#socialistchatuplines Fancy a revolution? Because I'm having an uprising.

Thomas Pilchard ‏@LawnmowerThomas 42m

Fancy a yacht in Corfu or a villa in Ibiza this year? #socialistchatuplines

Scott ‏@TheBenitezYears 44m

#socialistchatuplines "I love you more" "No...we love each other equally"

Eric Cartman ‏@CartmanUniverse 48m

#socialistchatuplines I'm huge in tractor production.

HM ‏@Shugism 57m

Is that a list of suspected traitors in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me? #socialistchatuplines

Eric Cartman ‏@CartmanUniverse 57m

#socialistchatuplines Can I show you my 5 Year Plan ?

Chris the Cabby ‏@chrschmbrln 1h

@ranty_man What do I do? Oh, not much, Mummy and Daddy have set me up a trust fund. #socialistchatuplines

HM ‏@Shugism 1h

Do you queue here often? #socialistchatuplines

Child Of Thatcher ‏@Thatchers_Child 1h

I have a huge share portfolio, own 3 properties & rent 2 out. My kids went to Oxbridge, of course I'm a socialist. #socialistchatuplines

Amit ‏@Pat3lli 1h

We can drink as much as you like, we don't have to foot the bill. #socialistchatuplines

Ranty Man ‏@ranty_man 1h

I would buy you a drink but private wealth is oppression! #socialistchatuplines

Child Of Thatcher ‏@Thatchers_Child 1h

So you like champagne? #socialistchatuplines

Mr B ‏@eurofan74 1h

May I say I just love your hairy legs #socialistchatuplines

Child Of Thatcher ‏@Thatchers_Child 1h

If you would like to go on a date with me, we'll need to complete 583218 forms & meet 14526842 targets first. #socialistchatuplines

neil ‏@BubBobz 1h

Do you squat here often? #socialistchatuplines

HM ‏@Shugism 1h

How do you like your wealth redistributed in the morning? #socialistchatuplines

The devilish one ‏@Jigglypuff2344 1h

#socialistchatuplines I give a great back massage.. but the beauty is it's not SO great that you would be able to work.

neil ‏@BubBobz 1h

Fancy coming back to mine for a fair-trade coffee? #socialistchatuplines

Chris the Cabby ‏@chrschmbrln 1h

@ranty_man No really, I think dungarees suit you. #socialistchatuplines

Amit ‏@Pat3lli 1h

Want to be friends with benefits? #socialistchatuplines

Ranty Man ‏@ranty_man 1h

So, which benefits do you claim? #socialistchatuplines

Harridan Harperson ‏@ihatelefties 1h

#socialistchatuplines Your place is mine

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About Tom Winnifrith
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Tom Winnifrith is the editor of TomWinnifrith.com. When he is not harvesting olives in Greece, he is (planning to) raise goats in Wales.
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