Argies

750 days ago

What war does the Guardian think started 40 years ago this weekend?

Of course, you and I know the answer.  Forty years ago, at the instigation of a fascist military dictatorship, the Argies invaded a group of Islands that had never been under the control of their country, and where the folks all wanted to be British. That was the start of the Falklands war, where Lady Thatcher led Britain to victory. Frankly, they should be erecting statues of the blessed Margaret in Argentina, as that defeat led to the demise of the fascist military dictatorship.

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1035 days ago

Preparing to Watch England vs Germany in Greece – you really are allowed to mention the war

You might just remember that my first night in Kambos, the village nearest to the Greek Hovel, saw Germany take on the Argies at football and, for reasons I am sure you can guess, I supported the Hun. The entire village was rooting for the Argies and I got dirtier and dirtier looks as the game went on, especially from the man who is now my best friend in town and my business partner, Nicho the Communist.

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2139 days ago

Tom Winnifrith Bearcast: cheering on anyone playing the fecking Argies

I record with Argentina and Iceland in the background on mute. Hell's teeth who on earth could support the fecking Argies? I explain the sheer torture Brokerman Dan Levi has in store for me in six weeks time and give him a reason to add to that. Andalas (ADL) is utterly worthless crap and his commentary on Friday and the statement that resulted utterly stinks. Anyhow consider how he will torture me as we walk 32 miles, feel sympathy and SPONSOR ME HERE. Then I look at Paul Scott winning an award for PR and at events at Theranos and Tesla.

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3502 days ago

My First Hangover at the Greek Hovel – getting to know the locals in Kambos

I had planned to stay sober until my return but I fear that I have been led astray. I blame OTE Telecom. I still cannot get on the interwebby at The Greek Hovel so spent all Sunday working from the Kouronis taverna in Kambos, run by lovely Eleni. At about 10 O’clock Greek Time I was done writing and asked for my bill. But instead I was summoned to the bar and asked to sit with four men.

Either side of me were two Gentlemen who spoke English. The younger (George) was a relative newcomer to the area, the elder (Nikos) is a greying stocky man with a walrus moustache. It was he who had cross words with me on my second day here when I supported the Krauts rather than the Argies in the football. Since then we have exchanged nothing but pleasantries. Behind Nikos was the man in the pink polo shirt (Vangelis) and behind George was another George, a Greek only speaking builder.

I was told “it is not will you have a drink but what are you drinking”. They were on the hard stuff and so I opted for ouzo. Nikos told me that they had decided they needed to know me better as I was now their neighbour.

They refused to let me pay and four hours later I was rather the worse for wear. Nikos was concerned about me biking home. He offered to drive me several times but since he was also a tad unsteady on his feet I declined

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3573 days ago

Not making myself popular in Greece – The World Cup Final causes a problem

I snuck out last night to watch the World Cup. The longer it lasted the more I could put off driving back along the long and windy road in the dark to the Greek Hovel. And even worse, to getting out of the car, walking ten yards through the grass to the Greek Hovel wondering what wildlife was lurking in the grass or inside the hovel. As it happens it was a wildlife free experience. Even Mr Rat seems to have “taken his medicine” and disappeared.

The taverna was packed and it soon became clear that I was the only person not supporting the Argies. As the Argies “scored” the taverna rose as one. As the linesman raised his flag for offside one fist punched the air. It was then that the dirty looks started.

How I wished I spoke Greek and could have explained that I too loathe the krauts but that the Argies are for Falkland’s related reasons even worse. But I spoke no Greek and so the loud cheers and increasingly timid punches from me continued. And then the Belgrano moment…The Argies sunk by a sub.  The Taverna was not happy. I was rather hoping that it would go to penalties so postponing my encounter with wildlife diversity back at the hovel but on balance was delighted.

Watching Germans celebrate and Angela Merkel smile and clap with joy caused me no great pleasure but 

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3596 days ago

The Argies vs The Islamofascists in the World Cup – who to support?

Tonight’s first World Cup game sees Islamofascists Iran up against the Argies. As a keen supporter of the Falkland Islands but also not a great fan of a country which strings gays up from cranes, treats women like third class citizens and wishes to complete Hitler’s work when it comes to the Jews this is a dilemma.

In an ideal world both would be found guilty of cheating and lose 10 points. Or maybe Argentina could default on its debt at half time (as it does every few years) and like a football league side lose 20 points?

It is too hard to call…on balance I suppose you have to go for the underdogs. Come on Iran!

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3909 days ago

NEW Today: Show your support for Gibraltar with Sod Off Spain T-shirt, mug, hoodie range

It seems that the Argies are not the only Spanish speaking folks with a train wreck of an economy who don’t give a flying wotsit about self-determination. This may not play well with any Spanish readers of this website but the folks in Gibraltar are British and want to stay British and so they should stay British.

I explained my anger at both the Spanish and the home grown deluded lefties who wish to betray our countrymen in a video postcard this weekend which you can watch here.

Now I have launched my brand new T-shirt, mug and hoodie range: Sod Off Spain! With the logo you can see below

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You can order your merchandise in my online store here

What better outfit could you sport if you are heading off to the Cost del Crime for a summer break?

The Sod off Spain range is in ideal compliment to the Piss off Argentina range which sports the logo below



You can order both Piss off Argentina and Sod off Spain goods only in my online store HERE

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4035 days ago

Margaret Thatcher 1925-2013 – Our greatest ever PM

There will no doubt be wild celebrations in parts of Islington, Bristol and bastions of the Guardian reading Middle Classes tonight.  After a long illness. Margaret Thatcher has died of a stroke today. This death will divide the nation.

I am watching the BBC’s coverage and it ignores her achievements totally. It is spiteful and worthless reporting.  The left will blame her for all sorts of matters and will delight in her demise. Already I see tweets saying “the witch is dead.” Expect a torrent of tasteless and unpleasant comments and myth perpetuation over the coming days. Thatcher had that effect – she polarized opinion.

That the left hated her with such a passion was down to the fact that she delivered so much of what the left claims as its own ground. And so the left claims to represent “women” but Thatcher showed that a woman could rise to the top based on ability and without positive discrimination. The left claims to look after the poor. But whereas Milliband, Brown, Blair etc are all solidly working class, it is the Tories who have delivered the leaders from truly humble origins (Heath, Major and above all Thatcher).

The left keeps its client state poor. Thatcher gave opportunity to that client state to get a better life: to earn more based on work and ,merit by breaking Union power and abolishing collective bargaining; to own their own home via council house sales, to save more by cutting taxes. That was revolutionary and Britain needed a revolution because in 1979 after the Winter of Discontent, Margaret Thatcher took control of a country on its knees: bankrupt and with no sense of national pride. Thatcher faced opposition from a left determined to keep the poor poor and from patrician Tories who did not wish to upset the status quo. Bravely she drove through change in society by ensuring that the State did less not more.

She was not always right. In her early career it was she who did away with large numbers of grammar schools. I suspect she regretted that. She did not stand up to Mugabe in his early years when the mad old kook could have been stopped. Again, I sense that she regretted that. But on the big calls Maggie was right and that is why the Left cannot abide her.

All those Guardian readers celebrating today were, if my age or older, proudly wearing CND badges and trooping off to Greenham during the cold war. Folks like Tony Blair, Paddy Pantsdown and Baroness Ashton may pretend otherwise but the lefties were wrong about how to win the Cold War while Maggie Thatcher and Ronald Regan were right. Many of those same lefties would have caved into the Argies in 1982. Thatcher stood firm, although some of those around her wobbled. For her it was a matter of principle. Thatcher was right about the ERM and the Euro. She was branded an out of touch nationalist for her views but her views were based on pure economics and she was once again right. She was right. The deluded lefties were wrong. History is on squarely her side.

In parts of the North they say that they cannot forgive her for closing the coal mines and other State subsidised rust belt industries. But the same folk lambast today’s politicians for bailing out the banks. Thatcher understood that there is no such thing as the Government’s cash. There is money paid over by the taxpayer and that cash cannot be wasted. Subsidising an industry which just cannot make a profit, whatever the industry is waste. It is taking money from those who are creating wealth and paying it to others who are not. Whether the recipients are bankers or miners Thatcher understood that such an action was wrong.

Today’s conservatives do not dare cut Government spending or taxes or foreign aid because they are afraid of being confrontational. They have forgotten what principle means. Thatcher never forgot principle and based every decision about it.

Margaret Thatcher was without doubt the bravest politician of the 20th century. She was without doubt the most principled politician of our lifetime. She was a truly amazing woman. And she was right about almost everything.

To celebrate any death shows that you have no heart.  We should pity those who celebrate the passing of Margaret Thatcher. This woman shaped the lives of a generation. She saved the UK from the bankruptcy and humiliation of the 1970s. She engineered a renaissance of Britain which all of her successors have done their best to dissipate.

Our greatest leader, Margaret Thatcher 1925-2013 RIP

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4052 days ago

The world explained by Two Cows - updated version

The bit at the top is a bit old. But read on down to give you an updated international perspective.

SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows. 
You give one to your neighbour. 

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows 
The State takes both and gives you some milk. 

FASCISM

You have 2 cows. 
The State takes both and sells you some milk. 

BUREAUCRATISM

You have 2 cows. 
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away. 

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows. 
You sell one and buy a bull. 
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. 
You sell them and retire on the income. 

VENTURE CAPITALISM
You have two cows. 
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. 
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. 
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. 

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. 
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. 
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has died. 

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4059 days ago

Friday Caption Contest Lord Ahmed (prize shit & convicted killer) issue

As I noted earlier today Labour peer Lord Ahmed killed a man by crashing his Jag into the man’s stationary car while texting away at 70 miles an hour. Ahmed reckons that service 16 days for this killing was harsh and only happened because he was a victim of the worldwide Jewish conspiracy. Labour has suspended this repellent anti-Semite but this is an easy call. What next. Julius Streicher, ooops I mean Lord Ahmed, made this claim on a video which I am sure Ed has seen. Either Labour believes in one nation or it does not.

And so this week’s caption contest comes with no prize just the chance to insult and abuse the spineless Ed Milliband as he decides whether he wishes to lead a party with at least one principle or to keep Lord Ahmed and those who agree with his vile views on board.  So please leave your entries for the picture below in the comments section.

My entry is:  “We are the party of one nation…except for the evil frigging Jews

Milliband if you wish to prove me wrong you know what to do with the despicable Lord Ahmed.

Last week I asked you for a caption to this picture of the General Belgrano

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4062 days ago

The Falklands 3 – the Islands votes “piss off Argentina”

The results of the Falklands Island Referendum are out. Turnout was 90%. 1,513 good folks voted to stay British. 3 electors voted to become Argies. To President Obama of the United States and President Cristina Fernandez of the bankrupt State of Argentina, I say: "your grasp of economics suggests that you are innumerate but even you can see that the message is loud and clear Piss off Argentina

Now please respect the principle of self-determination which throughout this world has, for a century, been universally accepted and just piss off and leave the Falklands alone. And British."

My only surprise is that there were three people on these British islands who wished to become Argies. But I guess after years of in-breeding you are going to get the odd person who ticks the wrong box by mistake.

You can, off course, show where you stand by buying your very own Piss off Argentina mug, T-shirt or hoodie in my online store HERE

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4065 days ago

Saturday Caption Contest – Falkland Islands Referendum Special

The people of the Falkland Islands will this weekend be allowed a vote on whether they wish to stay British or become Argies. How novel, folks being allowed to decide from where they are ruled? I doubt it will ever catch on back in the UK or not at least until 2018 or whenever.
 
Some people like the President of a nation built on the principle of self-determination back in 1776 (I refer to President Obama) do not care about the result and want the UK to start talks with the bankrupt imperialists of Argentina anyway.  I guess Obama is a clued up on democracy as he is on economics. 
 
But in honour of this vote I bring you this week’s Caption Contest. The winner gets a Piss off Argentina T-shirt which of course you can buy (with a Piss off Argentina mug) here.
 
 

For what it is worth my caption is:  

“Once again the Argies get that sinking feeling as the Falkland Islands referendum results come in”
 
If you can come up with anything better please post your entries in the comments section below.
 
Last week I served up two photos. The first was of Lord Rennard preparing to interview Lib Dem candidates for Parliament and the second was of a man who cannot remember anything bad and will be looking for a new job in 2015.

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4078 days ago

Think the unthinkable – UKIP might just win Eastleigh – worth a flutter at 11/2

The Lib Dems are still likely to win Eastleigh. If they do not, given that every councillor there is a Lib Dem and it is a Lib Dem seat then Nick Clegg is in deep trouble. It may well be that the cover-up over the Lord Rennard sex scandal is only a secondary worry although that will get very nasty as well. But at 11/2 UKIP is now worth a flutter. Think the unthinkable: UKIP might just win the by-election caused by Chris Huhne’s imminent fast track to prison.

A Populus poll shows Lib Dem 33%, Con 28% UKIP 21% ( but surging). However that assumes that undecided voters are reallocated on the basis of how the seat voted at the last General Election. That was a whole different ball game. Without that fiddle it is 31 (sex pest party), 26% ( hopeless party of Government), 25% UKIP.

Labour are on the low to mid teens and since the Labour candidate ( the one who supported the Argies in 1982 and wanted the IRA to kill Thatcher) is a prize loon, his vote could well slide far further. Labour voters in Eastleigh are not bourgeois Islington lefties who think the UKIP are unspeakably horrid but traditional working class voters who believe in hard work and have no truck with the EU, unrestricted Romanian immigration etc. They really should vote UKIP anyway and if they see UKIP as a chance to kick the wicked coalition in the goolies they may well switch. No: they are switching it is just a matter of how many more come over in the final few days.

If UKIP can pick up a few more percentage points from Labour ( and it is gaining support from all three parties) then life gets very interesting. It is hard to see the Lib Dem vote hardening in the final few days as the sex scandal widens and deepens and nothing the hopeless Government does these days does anything to attract those who should be core Tory voters. If it is anything the Tory party is meant to be the one that gets the economy right. And on Friday the UK lost its AAA rating as the credit agencies finally twigged that UK public finances are a mess and that things are not getting better.

A separate Survation phone poll has it as: Con 33, Lib Dem 29, UKIP 21, Lab 13 but again if you do not do the reallocation fiddle UKIP is up on 25 with this time the sex pests in second on 26, and the Tories on 29. The same arguments apply here. It is abundantly clear that this contest is a three way battle. Labour support is slipping steadily ( all to UKIP) and Nigel Farage et al must also think that in the next few days they can also pick up Lib Dems and Tories as well.

It will not change the world, but a UKIP win would be disastrous news for both Call Me Dave ( giving credibility to a party which believes in the sort of things the Tory party once believed in) and also for Clegg in that if the safest Lib Dem seat in England is lost what hope does his party have of avoiding electoral wipe-out in 2015.

At 11/2 it is worth a flutter. It might just happen.

And as I noted before, a UKIP vote is in fact the ONLY sane and honourable vote in Eastleigh. .

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4085 days ago

Why UKIP is the ONLY sane and honest vote in Eastleigh

I am not a UKIP member nor can my support be taken for granted – generally I despise all politicians and which they would just stop introducing laws and go away. And with that caveat I approach the looming by –election in Eastleigh with the conclusion that the ONLY sane and the ONLY honest vote is for UKIP.

The election is caused by liar and criminal Chris Huhne (Lib Dem) having to stand down because he is almost certainly heading for prison. In terms of Government and policy it will change nothing. We will still be ruled by this wretched Tory Lib Dem coalition and Labour will still be offering a principle free crackpot populist opposition. And as such an Eastleigh resident can vote with a clear conscience and on principle.

I start with why each of the candidates from the main three parties does not deserve to win a single vote before turning to UKIP.

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4110 days ago

Gotcha Again - I'm not crying for frigging Argentina

The Argie Type 42 Destroyer the Santisima Trinidad was the flagship of the invading forces the last time the Argies chose to ignore the principle of self determination and practice imperialism in the South Atlantic.

After Margaret Thatcher (rightly) gave the order to sink the Belgrano, this ship and the rest of the Argentine Navy headed back to port and sat out the military humiliation of their country in peace. The ship was decommissioned in 2004 but has sat in its full glory in port since then as a reminder of the Falklands campaign.

And this is it yesterday. Sinking faster than the Argentine economy.

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4122 days ago

Friday Caption Contest: MPs in the Age of Austerity Edition

I have just worked a 22 hour day, juggling the needs of sick staff, bills to pay, deadlines to meet etc. That is what life is like in the private sector. The bit of the economy that employs folks, pays over taxes to support the State, etc. And the chances of myself or my staff getting a 32% pay rise this year are zippo. Frankly almost no-one in the UK will get that sort of rise this year.

But one bunch of parasites, tarnished by allegations of corruption, working 3 days in 5 and universally despised reckon they merit a 32% hike taking them from the top 5% of earners into the top 1%. Even had I worked only 21 hours yesterday I would still be livid.

This week’s caption contest is in honour of the scumbags who forget that they work for us not the other way round. Please post your captions in the comments section below.

The best caption will win an “It’s Time to leave T-shirt which you can also buy exclusively here.

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4123 days ago

Piss off Argentina again – now you really are taking the er....piss

Argie President Fernandez really is a hoot. The woman is beyond parody. As her country’s economy sinks further down the plug-hole her posturing gets ever more ludicrous. Even deluded tax dodging lefties (i.e. the Guardian) must by now be giving up on her. Her latest outburst is a classic. Speaking after she managed to retrieve some old sailing boat used by her Navy for training which had been impounded in Ghana as a result of the Argies not paying their bills, the Botox Queen said:

Argentina once again has been attacked by speculative funds, and by others who threaten to come 12,000 kilometres (7,450 miles) to invade and militarise our Malvinas.

Er…. hang on those would be the Malvinas commonly known as the Falkland Islands which have been British for almost 200 years, where 100% of the population want to stay British and where the only country that has tried to invade them and militarise them in the past Century has been the Argies in 1982. And we know what happened to the pride of Argentina’s navy then.

This is not going to stop. As the Argie economy sinks faster than the General Belgrano there will be more outbursts. This will only stop when Ferrnandez fails to deliver the Falkland’s for her people and like General Galtieri she pays the price for failed sabre rattling ( or in his case sabre usage) and is slung out.

You can show your feelings on this issue by buying a “Piss off Argentina”, T-shirt, sweatshirt, hoodie or mug here at my online store

And don’t forget to enter this week’s Caption Contest – Piss off Argentina special HERE.

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4128 days ago

Friday Caption Contest: Piss off Argentina Edition

If there are any readers of the tax dodging, paedophilia endorsing, Argie loving Guardian reading this blog they may enter this week’s caption contest if they wish. But I warn them now that entries such as “brave anti imperialist campaigner President Fernandez is awarded a prize for delivering economic success by following the teachings of Ed Balls” will not win.

I am sure that regular readings can come up with better captions to the picture below. The most apt caption will win a Piss off Argentina T-shirt.

I know that two readers (Jon and Chris) were wearing their shirts with pride today as was I. If you wish to buy your own T-shirt ( or mug) you can do so at my online store here.

For what it is worth my entry is: “ Following her successful implementation of an economic policy devised by the Greek Government Argentine President Fernandez is handed a one way plane ticket to a destination selected by her adoring public back home.”

I am sure you can do better. Post your entries in the comments section below.

Last week I asked you for suitable captions to a picture containing a photo of Britain’s two least wanted men.

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4129 days ago

Britain’s £27 million in Foreign Aid to the Frigging Argies, I just Despair

I would scrap all Foreign Aid tomorrow as most of the cash is wasted, few poor folks benefit and Bankrupt Britain cannot afford to piss away £11 billion a year. In the greater scheme of pissing away cash £27 million is not a lot but to hand that money to the frigging Argies who are demanding that we hand over British Land lived in by British Citizens (viz the Falklands) just fills me with the despair.

Of the £27 million, £20 million is our slug of a£450 million loan from the IMF. That the Argies need an IMF bailout at tall shows why its demented President Fernandez is sabre rattling: because under her stewardship the economy has gone down the pan. But why Bankrupt Britain should have to bail the old trout out is beyond me. But it gets worse.

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4129 days ago

My 3000th Tweet was today after seven months on twitter

I used to laugh at twitter as a place where morons swapped inanities. I now realise my mistake. That is Facebook. Seven months since my pal Paul Nicholson persuaded me that I should start tweeting I have today just sent out my 3,000th tweet. Of the 500 million tweeters on this planet I am, after seven months, apparently now just outside the top 2 million in terms of followers with 2,777 followers. It is a logarithmic table. The average following is sub 150. The most followed person (Lady Gaga) has 33 million followers. Heaven knows why.

I use twitter to send out links to all articles I write on the 10 free to access sites to which I contribute, links to articles elsewhere I find interesting and the occasional thought that crops up which is not big enough for an article. But I also find it strangely addictive, swapping ideas, arguing or swapping jokes with a few of my fellow tweeters. It is vaguely satisfying making sure that the twitter feed of the dilly cow who leads the Argies now has a link to my latest thoughts on her 3rd rate country with Imperialist ambitions. And so I confess I like twitter.

I am still not entirely sure how its business model makes it worth tens of billions of dollars but who cares. As a user I find it useful, a source of ideas and entertainment and a great way to communicate. I guess that I am now a confirmed twit.

You can follow me on twitter @tomwinnifrith

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4130 days ago

Piss off Argentina and your tax dodging pals at the Guardian

The Argentine economy is going down the toilet. Inflation is 25%, growth is slowing fast and workers are protesting on the streets. In large part this is down to the misguided policies of the Botox-loving President Fernandez. In order to deflect attention from her own incompetence the silly cow is once again stoking up a row over the ownership of the Falkland Islands where a plebiscite this year will show that 99% of the sheep shaggers wish to stay British.

Her latest ruse is to waste Argie Government cash by taking out an advert in a British paper which makes huge operating losses from spouting piffle for its dwindling readership of ageing deluded lefties and whose (profitable) parent company is one of the smartest tax dodgers going. I refer, of course, to the Guardian. Both Argentina and the Guardian can piss right off.

Britons settled in the Falklands when they were deserted since the European political elite who rule the artificially created country that is Argentina were, at that time, too busy exterminating native Indians

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4200 days ago

The Husband Application Form from Victoria

I find myself once again drawn to the blog of politically switched on first year student blogger Victoria by her article “Husband Application Form.” Before you accuse me of having John Peel-esque tendencies I stress that I read on only in the interests of research. Damn. That did not help Pete Townshend. Anyhow I digress.

I am, as it happens, not drawn to women too young (or to old) to name all the members of Blur or to be able to remember where they wept the day Margaret Thatcher was ousted by the Euro traitors and where they celebrated the sinking of the Belgrano.

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